Comma Catch-Up Series: The Style Confidence Loops — How What You Wear Shapes How You Show Up
What you wear is never just fabric. It’s energy. It’s identity. It’s communication before you’ve said a single word.
For this month’s Comma Catch-Up, we welcomed Maren Swenson, a style and sensuality coach, to explore the connection between clothing and confidence. When we treat clothing as a tool instead of an afterthought, it becomes a daily opportunity to reinforce who we are and who we’re becoming. Here’s what we learned about using style intentionally.
Why Style Matters
Style is so much more than just articles of clothing. What you wear shapes how you feel, move, and lead. Maren approaches clothing as a tool for creating the life we want. Because clothing is something we wear every day anyway, it’s a foundational part of designing your dreams.
“What you wear affects how you walk into a room, how you feel in your body, how you show up in relationships and conversations, and how willing you are to be seen,” said Maren. “Every day, whether we know it or not, we’re reinforcing our identity through our clothes.”
Her message was simple but powerful: style isn’t about trends or rules — it’s about alignment. The way you dress shapes how you carry yourself, how you enter a room, and how boldly you lead in your work.
Maren’s Style Tips
Unlike many other fashion stylists, Maren doesn’t use color analysis or other formulaic rules. Instead, her guidance is based on an individual’s mood and goals. Here are some of the tips she gave us.
Ask yourself some questions
Before you head to your closet, Maren has some questions that are worth considering. Ask yourself the following before you get dressed for the day:
If someone formed their first impression of you based purely on what you typically wear, what might they assume about you?
What do you wear when you’re struggling?
What kinds of energy are you drawn toward?
What would change if you trusted your taste more?
What are you afraid would happen if you dressed more like yourself?
Is your current style supporting the person you want to be?
Ask yourself what you want to feel
One of the tricky parts about style is that each person has many facets. One day you may feel like a boss babe and want to dress like you’re Donna from Suits. A warm spring day may make you feel more boho-chic. Sometimes, if you’re taking care of sick kids, you might need to opt for something more practical (and machine-washable).
The many parts of ourselves and the various demands of life can change day to day. That’s why it’s critical to ask yourself how you want to feel in your clothes. Once you decide what you want to feel, you can use clothing to help create that reality.
Maren’s advice is backed up by studies. Psychology researchers found that fashion and clothing can boost psychological well-being on different levels, including affecting someone’s mood, emotions, happiness, quality of life, creativity, and relationships with others.
Love yourself as you are
Fashion is all about self-love. Unfortunately, so many people — especially women — shop for clothes wistfully, wishing they were a body type or a personality type that’s different from who they currently are.
It’s not helpful to shop from a place of lacking or a scarcity mindset. Don’t wear an outfit just because it looked good on a mannequin or on someone at the gym. Style is an intentional way to support who you are and let yourself be seen as your true self. That can be scary, but it’s worth the authenticity.
Instead of dressing from a place of wishing you were some nonexistent version of yourself, aim to dress from a place of knowing that you deserve the life you want. You deserve to feel free and comfortable (both physically and emotionally) in what you’re wearing. Choose a look that tells your body, “I am loved. I appreciate myself, I accept myself, and I honor myself.” This helps you reinforce who you are, rather than punishing yourself for not being someone else.
Pay attention to your gut reaction
Did you get dressed this morning, look in the mirror, and say, “Ooh, yes please!”? If you didn’t, you might want to think about why not.
Your nervous system is constantly giving you hints. If you pay attention to what your reactions are to different outfits, you can get a sense of what’s working for you and what isn’t. Notice what your desires are and use them for data and information. Your desires aren’t shallow; they’re a form of intelligence that is whispering to you, telling you what you want more or less of in your life.
Clothing is at its best when it’s working with, not against, your nervous system. Your body pays attention to your feelings. If your immediate reaction to your outfit is one of self-criticism or of settling for something you grabbed from your closet, examine why. Don’t worry about your weight, your age, or what someone else will think. Think about what you would wear without second-guessing or asking for permission. Maren encourages women to ditch the rules and trust themselves to wear what’s calling to them.
To learn more style tips, watch the full presentation here.
How Our Personality Shines in Our Work
When we feel confident in the way we dress, we put our best selves into our writing. The authenticity and freedom at Comma empower each of our writers to dress expressively, create engaging content, capture your brand, and relate with your audience.
If you’re interested in content that’s infused with personality and beating with authenticity, schedule a call with Comma today.
